The Unfulfilled Desire for Control.
The desire to control things is deeply rooted in human nature. It stems from the wish not to expose oneself to constantly changing conditions, circumstances, and developments. Even the best plan becomes obsolete as soon as just one parameter changes, let alone when a better plan comes along. The determination to control as much as possible is bound to fail, especially once children enter the picture.
It is already difficult to gain control over oneself, so what happens when unpredictability, the unexpected, and the unknown come into play through children? Control, up to a certain point, is not what truly matters. It is similar to creativity, which only becomes truly interesting when it moves beyond what can be controlled.
The most beautiful and interesting stories usually arise exactly where control ends. So why this constant urge for control? When dealing with children, control often becomes almost amusing from a parent’s perspective. Looking back, one realizes that children make many forms of control impossible, not to take control away from parents, but because the unexpected and the unknown are natural parts of childhood.
You are constantly faced with situations that turn out differently than expected, situations you could not have foreseen. And this is precisely where nannies excel. They remain calm and composed.
Because this is their greatest strength: meeting the unexpected with a sense of calm. Responding to each unforeseen situation with the right reaction and decision. Fear, worry, haste, and frustration are never good advisors, awareness and mindfulness in all their forms are.
Often, it is not about the situation itself, but about the people involved who had different expectations that were not fulfilled. However, if one focuses on the situation itself, free from expectations and judgments, then exactly what the title suggests happens: the path emerges by walking. Thinking ahead, continuing forward, and moving on are the best conditions for ultimately arriving where one intended to go.
It may sound unusual, but it is true. Experience has taught us that control is a form of illusion. Therefore, an unhealthy need for control should never be the goal. Being open to everything, reassessing every situation anew, and always taking the next better, more sensible, and safer step, this is what moves everyone forward, step by step, toward desirable outcomes.
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